Roses are red, tulips are yellow,
That woman alongside you, she be one CRAZY fellow!
Whether it be writing “I love you” in the sky, in the local newspaper, or even across one’s own forehead, it pretty much goes without saying that people do some crazy things when they’re in love! Over the years, we’ve heard reports of folks erecting statues on not-so-public pieces of land, teaching their pets elaborate dance moves, and even buying plots of land on the moon for their loved ones (I did happen to like that one myself, though!), so it would seem to me that just about anything is possible of Valentine’s Day, right?
Well, anything except straitjackets, anyways…
But I’m certainly not trying to denounce a little healthy kink in the bedroom these days…unless the thought of a bound up Teddy Ruckspin brings home the bacon for you, that is! I bring this up because recently everyone’s favorite teddy bear manufacturer – The Vermont Teddy Bear Co. – made headlines with some of these very same ideas…and not necessarily in a good way, either. How could an organization filled with love and fluff like Vermont possibly get on anyone’s bad side, you ask? Well, long story short – one of their creations entitled “Crazy for You” featured a bear sporting a straitjacket, complete with commitment papers and the whole nine yards…and needless to say, somebody got offended.
I’ve got to say that it takes a certain kind of person to get offended by a teddy bear…not exactly somebody that I’d want living next to my padded house…but needless to say, we don’t call them crazy just because they dress all in white! Come to think of it, brides also dress all in white…coincidence?! I think not…
(Pause to allow the hate-mailers a moment to gather their torches and pitchforks…)
But seriously folks, if you ask me, you’ve just got to be a little crazy to be in love – that’s just how it works, right? No other explanation justifies all of the work that we put into simply making one other person like us better than all of the rest – cooking, cleaning, even keeping ourselves groomed! Think about it, ladies – many of you make regular trips to the salon to have boiling hot wax poured over your nether-regions…anybody doing it just because it’s fun?! If that’s not enough to convince you, then just take a gander over at your local Piercing Pavilion and let me know what you find out!
Of course, when it all comes down to it, maybe just a little crazy love is all you need. One special person to help you through the good and the bad, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live…or at least until she finishes chewing her way through the straps…