“So how do you come up with this stuff, anyways???”
That’s the question that I probably get asked the most often about being a humor columnist, that is, right after “Why don’t you write more about beets?” and “Seriously, would it kill you to just throw in a couple of beet jokes every once in a while?!” And while not to intentionally turn a blind eye on all of my beloved fans in the Midwest Beet Belt of America, I thought that it might make for an interesting change of pace this month to take a little time to talk about just what goes into the making of your favorite humor column each and every week.
Maybe next time, Uncle Ned, but until then, keep those beet pies a’coming! Yummy…
Anyways, a lot of people are kind of surprised to learn that a good portion of The Humor Column is actually based on things that happen to me in my own real life … like when I hit an alligator with my car while driving home one night, or when I met a particularly awesome fellow Scott who treated us well when we purchased my wife’s new car, or even that time when I showed an incredible amount of restraint by not covering everything I could possibly find with that delicious chocolate frosting in a can! What can I say – when your life is just as naturally hilarious as mine is on a regular basis, finding something amusing to write about can sometimes be as easy as sitting down to a nice, healthy breakfast…
Then there are other times when it’s more of a random observation that catches my eye and amuses me enough to spark my imagination, like noticing that I tend to be more productive while having nearly every need imaginable fulfilled on a luxury cruise ship! Maybe I might see an important issue that needs to be brought to the forefront, like a few months ago when the masculinity of pretty much every man on the planet was being challenged by that very suave and very shirtless dude from those Old Spice commercials, or maybe it’s just one of those weeks where I feel like recognizing a certain snack food as the absolute bestest holiday munching paraphernalia around.
Of course, the idea is just the beginning – the mere seed for a humor column, if you will. From there it takes a bit of creativity, a dash of luck, and for me typically three or four hours of writing, re-writing, brainstorming and procrastinating to turn that single funny thought or moment into a full-fledged humor column like the ones that you read here every week. Some prove to be easier to write than others, and some make you want to throw your keyboard out the window and move to Nebraska to settle into a simpler life of beet farming with your Uncle Ned, but at the end of the day, nothing is more rewarding than seeing that new humor column that you just brought into the world with your own two hands making people laugh on its very own!
It’s almost enough to make you feel like writing a humor column of your own, isn’t it?! Well, before you get too excited and go jumping in over your head, there’s still a lot more for us to talk about – things like proofreading and deadlines and whether it’s funnier to breastfeed or bottle-feed. Don’t worry, though, we’ll go over all of these things in more detail than you could ever possibly desire as I continue to share my wisdom in this one-of-a-kind series that takes you behind the scenes of my very own baby, The Humor Column…
Next week’s lesson: the subtle art of creating your own facts!