Latest Columns
Break-Up Letter to a Tree…
Dear Ginormous Oak Tree Towering in My Front Yard, I don’t love you anymore. If we’re being frank, and I don’t know why I wouldn’t because I’m talking to a tree, I’...
Calling All Karens
“I want to speak to the manager of the Internet – this website is distracting me and preventing me from writing my humor column!” Oh, Karen… Not a week goes by without your smu...
Lord, Have Mercy on My Toilets…
Have you ever wondered about the volume of poop that comes out of your household on a daily basis? For the amount of time that I’ve spent behind the business end of a toilet plunger these last c...
What To Do on Your Summer Vacation … During a Global Pandemic … and Mass Protests
I don’t think it really comes as much of a surprise when I say that this summer is going to be a bit different than what we normally expect from summers around here. We’d like to pretend t...
Black Lives Matter
Racism is bad. I mean, really really bad. In fact, let me say it one more time for the people all the way in the back – racism is probably one of the worst manifestations that mankind as a speci...
Oh Good, It’s Almost Hurricane Season!
The State of Florida certainly has its share of hazards… Hurricanes, love bugs, the infamous Florida Man himself. Of course, we typically don’t find ourselves having to take on all of them...
Spring Cleaning Is Cancelled This Year
You’d think that my house would be sparkling like Mr. Clean’s chrome dome after being stranded here with only groceries and the occasional trip to the mailbox to lure me outdoors for the p...
Of Course Nobody Likes Wearing Masks!
With the exception of maybe bandits and bank robbers, I think it’s pretty safe to say that nobody actually enjoys wearing the masks that have become a mainstay in our everyday lives to help slow...