Latest Columns
A Maze of Any Other Flavor…
There are many foods that I’ve occasionally dreamt of finding myself lost in a maze of … pizza, General Tso’s chicken, those giant chocolate chip cookies from Panera that just about�...
Real Men Reluctantly Dress Up for Halloween
Few guys other than Johnny Depp can really pull off the pirate look, and I’m still pretty sure that even he goes through at least a bottle of rum a day just to ensure that he stays in character...
Life is Like a Poop
I dream of a day when my best stories don’t involve my child’s pooping activities… …but alas, today is not that day. Although it’s mostly true that his craziest of poops...
The Future Has Never Been Cheesier!
I never thought that I’d live to see the day when Kraft Macaroni & Cheese could be delivered to my door with the click of a button. The barriers were simply too great – websites contai...
No, You Can’t Play With That!!!
I have this conversation with my 1 1/2 year-old son on pretty much an hourly basis: Kid: Hey Dad, check out this new thing that I found to chew on! (mind you, he doesn’t really talk yet, bu...
Filter This!
I’d like to have a word with the guy who installed the AC vents in my house. I don’t know if he just happened to be extraordinarily tall or if there’s actually some boring, scienti...
Scott’s Guide to Common Courtesy
I know, I know … if we’re just being honest here, nobody really likes being courteous to others! I mean, sure, we begrudgingly do it because society implores us to be kind to our neighbor...
I Now Own a Chainsaw
You’d probably think that I’d be happy … perhaps even excited about this, but I assure you I’m really not. Sure, chainsaws are among the manliest of tools, whether you’...