A Tale of Two Toilets
Talk about a week gone down the tubes… I thought I was doing a good thing two falls ago when I moved from my apartment to a stately condo on the other side of town. The neighborhood was nicer (read:...
April Showers Make for One Soggy Scott
It’s been raining a lot lately. I know that’s how the poem goes and everything, but in the meantime it can sure be a pain in the butt for the rest of us who don’t even like flowers! They didn’...
Always Low Prices at the Epicenter of Stupidity
I have a new theory that I want to run by you all today. It’s pretty complex, so I hope you brought a pencil and something to wipe your brow off with afterwards, but just try to keep up. It’s a th...
Toilet Humor
Ladies, you might want to sit this one out – go grab a drink and just talk amongst yourselves for the next few minutes – because the men and I need to have a little talk… We need to have a littl...
Sex on the Beach, Eh, Almost…
Don’t worry – I know what you’re thinking, so before you get all excited and mount that high-horse of yours, I want to assure you that this isn’t going to be another one of those columns w...
For Those Still in Doubt, a Florist I am Not…
Cross another one off the list, my friends… That is, that ongoing compilation of occupations that I, Scott Sevener, am never, ever, ever going to be able to fill in my wildest of dreams. Said list i...
The Tivo Revolt
So it’s done – I’m officially on my Tivo’s shitlist… And although I don’t know exactly how I got here, what I will certainly profess is that I don’t like it one bit! I don’t want t...
I Have a Dentist Appointment … in About Four Months
And right now, I’m not sure if I’m more worried about the pain or the incessant lecturing that one can only expect when he hasn’t been to the dentist in over a decade! Hey, I’ve been busy… B...